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Guidelines for a successful relationship – how can you get one in a few easy steps?

No one is born a relationship guru, but we all strive to become one to some extent. Both for our own good and that of our relationships and for sharing our advice and guidelines with others, spreading the joy.

So what is it that defines a healthy, happy relationship? Is it the things you have in common, is it the amount of time you spend together, is it the dreams or vision of the future that you share?

First off, the key to any healthy relationship starts with your level of self-satisfaction. Make sure you respect yourself and keep true to your beliefs and principles. Have hobbies, enjoy yourself and your alone time and accept the other’s need for this, too. A person that fully embraces their own personality and individuality is much likely to understand and embrace someone else’s particularities. To seek is not enough. It’s how you seek that does the trick. Once your own happiness is in place your energy will attract someone to share your good vibes with.

Relationship gurus agree that there are at least a few traits that may ensure you are on the right track to finding happiness as a couple. One of the most important aspects is being realistic in your expectations. As reputed author Mark Manson puts it “True love — that is, deep, abiding love that is impervious to emotional whims or fancy — is a choice. It’s a constant commitment to a person regardless of the present circumstances. It’s a commitment to a person who you understand isn’t going to always make you happy”. We all need to remember that true, committed relationships are built by two people and none of those two should consider him or herself entitled to more. A strong foundation is what will hold the two of you together through tougher times, it is what will give you courage to trust the other’s love more each day, knowing that what you share is more than passing circumstances. Accept that your life together will not be made up of Hollywood movie scenes, but of small instances of affection and care that may go unnoticed if your expectations are unrealistic.

Considering this, you should always be sure that the reasons keeping you and that special someone together are true. Don’t worry about what people may say, don’t settle because you feel alone, don’t let habit get the best of you. Trust your instincts, you will know if your love is true.

Respect your partner, always put communication first. Accept that the other may have a different perspective, talk about it. These are aspects all the gurus put emphasis on. Never let a small fight become a big problem because you failed to discuss it with your better half when you should have. You will find that talking things out is always the best idea.

Another very important aspect is to always make time for your relationship. Share ideas, share moments, share dinner, share a bottle of wine, share a walk, share a movie. The time you spend together doing even the smallest of things will give you the connection it needs and it will help keep your relationship alive and fresh. Find the time and you will see it’s worth it.

People change, relationships change, circumstances change. Be ready to accept and embrace it. It will allow you to be a supportive partner and to understand the other’s need to evolve.

Last but not least, remember that a good foundation and a grounded partnership will keep your relationship strong no matter what. 

Dec 03, 2017

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